Sunday, August 28, 2005

"It's the question, Neo. It's the question that drives us. It's the question that brought you here. You know the question, just as I did.... The answer is out there, Neo, and it's looking for you, and it will find you if you want it to."

Trinity to Neo, The Matrix

The party's over...it's the last day of my vacation.

So sad to think that I have to go back to the rock quarry tomorrow :(

I had a good day. Jacqui and I went to Borders and picked up a few books. I found one on "channeling" - curious to see what the channelers mean by 'vibrations' and all.

And this evening, I turned-on a widower friend to Coldstone's Ice Cream...just love that place. They plop a big scoop of ice cream onto this cold slab, and then mix-in basically anything you want....cake, bananas, nuts, white chocolate - you name it, they have it.

Talk about being decadent...mmmmm. Guess I'll have to work out a little harder tomorrow morning to make a dent in the ol' caloric intake...

And I had my wrist and arm "sniffed". I can honestly say that the experience was a first for me. Crazy widowers :)

So tonight my friend and I were commiserating about what it means to 'move on'. You hear this term used all the time by widows. Basically it's widow-speak for the process of moving past your grief, picking up the pieces and going forward.

But what does it really mean?

Does it refer to the point where you realize who and what you are, sans the spouse? Do those who have moved-on have better clarity about where they're going in life? Does it mean re-inventing your "self" - and if so, how the hell do you do that?

Is this a term for people who get into new, serious relationships? Or can you be in a serious relationship without having truly moved on?

How does one get to the "I've moved on" point? And how do you know you're there? What is it that we'll be moving away from - the pain & feeling of loss, the "old" person that we were as part of a couple?

All of the above? Some of the above? None of the above?

Ah, so many questions...gotta stop drinking those late night lattes'